type this

funny. this morning, i was talking with my co-worker colleen about drinks (it's never too early), and i mentioned how my ex used to make a certain drink. and then she asked me what my type was. i answered with "whoever tolerates me." but that got me to thinking (in a very stereotypical carrie bradshaw "i couldn't help but wonder ..." way) "do i have a type?"

let's examine the facts.

first pseudo-bf: tall, skinny, white, didn't label himself, also had a girlfriend, made me feel bad about myself because he was cheating on her with me, and she was a nice girl.

second pseudo-bf: a little taller than me, average, white, made me feel bad about myself because he wouldn't say he was gay and always flirted and went on dates with girls.

first bf: tall, muscular prison guard, white, made me feel bad about myself because, well, i lied to him about my age.

second bf: tall, jewish argentinian, skinny, largely ignored me, made me gain weight, constantly made me feel like shit.

third bf: a little latter than me, hispanic, preppy, former eagle scout, super nice, then vanished, which made me feel like i had done something to turn him off; later found out (by him) that i reminded him of the uncle that had molested him.

fourth bf: tall, blond, painfully white, said i was clingy when i was pretty much the opposite, made me feel like shit because of such.

fifth bf: tall, quite lanky, depressed, heavy drinker, nice guy, cheated on me, so i always thought he was cheating on me.

hmm. maybe my type is just someone that'll make me feel like shit.

meh.